I think for most of my Christian life, I would have said 'yes' to this question, but honestly, in hindsight, I can now see where I was really missing the mark in one particular area of my life.
The Holy Spirit gently and lovingly showed me how I had been hindering God’s Will in my emotional life, every time I played out old childhood patterns of survival in my marriage and in my interactions with my children, extended family, and friends. I learned that by replaying these old childhood patterns, they were not only creating unhealthy horizontal relationships but were having a direct impact on my primary vertical relationship, with God. One relationship cannot exist without affecting the other!
Through these two amazing books by Fr. Martin Padovani, the Holy Spirit helped me to see that by minimizing and avoiding facing my past and present emotional realities I was not following God’s Will in this area of my life.
Over time I became more cognizant of how I was using pride and vanity to justify my actions and reactions. Gradually, I came to see the big picture and the impact these negative repercussions were having not just in my emotional life but in every area of my life. Like the ripples, you see when you throw a stone in still waters.
As I prayed to God to show me the roots of these old destructive patterns from a spiritual perspective, through His eyes. That’s when the Holy Spirit prompted me to read this book, during the following Lent.
Let’s just say, that Lenten season my whole world opened up with completely new eyes! As only God can do! And the Holy Spirit showed me how these old, destructive emotional childhood patterns were not only being fed by my root sin of pride but I was also shown how my predominant fault of anger had been manifesting throughout my current adult life. And still, to this day, I have to be conscientious of how my primary wound of rejection can become inflamed during interactions with certain people and or circumstances.
Unfortunately, situations and circumstances in my life had grown more and more burdensome, before all these realities became conscious and clear. Every season I was hit with one more tragedy or life’s curveball or a “life pop quiz” it took a huge toll on me physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and socially. I became increasingly lonelier, more apathetic, and more exhausted! The combination made it near impossible to serve others in perfect love, as God has commanded all of us to do.
************
I pray you found what you were needing today. Please leave a comment below, I would love to hear how this post might have been helpful for you.
Remember you are not alone! No matter what you’ve done or failed to do you are still loved unconditionally by a very merciful and just Lord and Savior!
May God Bless You,
Leslie
No comments:
Post a Comment